my daily dream, something hard to explain, i dont know how to start
everything looks so complicated, but at the same time it has a logic
at least for me.

after years of depresion and several attemps, im facing my reallity
in the place where i can be more damage, my dreams.

for several nights so far i've been haging the same kind of dreams
me killing myself, same way, different story.
its really hard to see yourself that way, no matter how many times have you tried
in the past.

i wonder if im being ponish for all that i did before, i afraid to sleep now
several nights awake only make it worse, i try not to sleep
but at the end it beats me and then it comes to me.
it seems like an enless dream, i cant wake up no matter how much i try
but at the end, the tears are the prove that i was there.

lately im wondering myself, am i a rational person?, no, im not
i know im not, just take a look at my hands and you will see how
lost i am.
and maybe, the most important question the last two days
am i gonna end like that in real life?

all i know is im afraid